So, you’re a Mum already..how do you react to pregnant women?
So, you’re a Mum already, you have more than one child, you have experienced pregnancy and you have your thoughts and opinions on pregnancy, based on your experience. So, when you hear a heavily pregnant woman complaining about swollen ankles, or braxton hicks, how do you react?
I’m having my third child, I’m 8 months pregnant and I am fairly huge, so I think most people can guess I’m nearing the end of pregnancy. This is actually my sixth pregnancy, and it’s the first one after two consecutive losses, so I know my body and yet admit I’m perhaps a little precious of this pregnancy. However I still do all the things I did pre-pregnancy, with the exception of the food shopping as I found carrying it all from the car inside just too much. So, imagine my amazement when I made a comment about how I was feeling in this pregnancy, to someone a barely know who had asked how I was feeling, and I received a reply which was clearly intended to remind me that she had been there and done that and I was making an un-necessary fuss. I couldn’t resist retaliating with words which basically told her she didn’t know a thing about my pregnancy.
Pregnancy is a funny thing, while lots of women have experienced it, no two pregnancies are the same, even for the same woman! Each of my pregnancies has been different, whether it be due to lethargy, bleeding, nausea or something else, there has been little for me to go “Oh yes, I always feel this way..” and even if there were, would I assume someone else felt the same?! I may try to empathise with someone and their pregnancy symptoms, or I may try to reassure them, but to actively behave as if they’re making a fuss about nothing when they’re just stating that’s how they feel.. no? Perhaps I am too sensitive, or perhaps I am wrong? Should I be telling all the pregnant ladies I know to “get over it!” ?! I don’t think I want to, even if I am wrong in listening to their grumbles or voicing my experience in case it can help, I won’t start behaving like I know it all, as frankly I don’t.
strangely enough i also wrote a post today about people not having empathy