Newborn Baby.. (the things you forget about having one..)

It starts when you first hold them in your arms, although this isn’t the first time you’ve held a newborn baby you suddenly realise you have no recollection of how to hold a newborn. They feel so delicate, so wobbly, it feels like holding an egg shell! Then, you realise you have forgotten how to dress a newborn, they don’t lie still like a doll as you try to dress them, they wriggle and their arms flay in all the wrong directions as you find yourself mentally begging them to let you get the baby gro on.

Then there’s the baby poo, breast fed baby poo has a very special smell, you forget it until you catch a whiff and all the memories of the last time you had to deal with baby poo come flooding back… Oh and yes.. you become obsessed with the colour and quantity of baby poo.. You promise yourself you won’t but then within a week you’ll be say there going “oh, is it meant to be that colour?!” or “oh wow..how much poo?!”

The sleep, or more to the point the lack of sleep. You forget how bad it feels, you almost remember it fondly..then when you have another baby..you remember it all to clearly.. While you quickly learn to readjust to sleep deprived life, it won’t stop you sitting and wasting more energy crying at 3am while you are changing the 7th nappy of the night.. You forget that when you are that tired, sometimes words don’t come easily, and in fact sometimes they come out all wrong..and suddenly you have said something totally ridiculous..and are oblivious until you are being given a look of horror by the recipient of your random remark.

You forget that your new perfume will mostly be eau d’baby sick, with under tones of baby poo and sudocrem. It’s a strange stench similar to sour cream and well.. poo. A scent that you’re happy to be rid of once you move on from newborn stage, but one where a single whiff takes you right back.

What did you forget about having a newborn until you had another (or held a friends newborn after your own)?